RSS

Tag Archives: funny

A sheep thing

sheep

This post was a classic case of ‘following the herd’… a blog post that everyone has passed around at some point in their blogging. I found it amusing. I still do. Need a chuckle? That is, aside from those moments when you nod and think “Yes"!”

* I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
* Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
* I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
* There is great need for a sarcasm font.
* How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
* Was learning cursive really necessary?
* Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
* I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
* Bad decisions make good stories.
* You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
* I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
* "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -ever.
* I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?
* I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
* I keep many people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I can look like I know many people.
* I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
* I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid " routing option.
* Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
* I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
* I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
* How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?
* I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a roadhog from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
* Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Trousers? Trousers never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
* Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?
* There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
* Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
* Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

Advertisements
 
2 Comments

Posted by on August 26, 2012 in fun, humour

 

Tags: ,

Hubby humour

Jurgis thought he’d brighten up my day, so I got this in a text file…

spike milligan
Spike Milligan’s cheeky look here
reminded me so much of my grandfather!

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
Spike Milligan

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
Spike Milligan
Ooh! I love this one!

And God said, ‘Let there be light’ and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
Spike Milligan
That must be Britain… it’d be way longer here.

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
Spike Milligan

I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
Spike Milligan
I could apply this to a few singers. Don’t know who the singer is.

I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
Spike Milligan

I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
Spike Milligan

I’m not afraid of dying I just don’t want to be there when it happens.
Spike Milligan

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
Spike Milligan

It’s all in the mind, you know.
Spike Milligan

Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
Spike Milligan

Money couldn’t buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.
Spike Milligan

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.
Spike Milligan

 

Technorati Tags: ,
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 12, 2010 in humour

 

Tags: ,

 
The Druid's Garden

Spiritual Journeys in Tending the Land, Permaculture, Wildcrafting, and Regenerative Living

Purple Herbal

Sharing My Passion For Nature With The World

Furious Curious Cancer Survivor

I would have beaten any type of cancer

The imperfect cooks

Just another WordPress.com weblog

Solaris

Welcome to the real world

Forest and Fungi

Part of my journey to contribute to a more beautiful world...

tywyllseren

Musings From an Alternate Universe

cancer killing recipe

Just another WordPress.com site

Speaking in Symbols

Learning the language of the subconcious

The Happy Living People Project

Smile! You’re at the best WordPress.com site ever

Bonofa 'The Future is Now'

The greatest WordPress.com site in all the land!

Ian Waldick

The Adventures of an Irish Farmer

Hiking Photography

Beautiful photos of hiking and other outdoor adventures.

Rolbos ©

Living the life of the common people.

The Millennium Conjectures™

A Blog of the Ridiculous and Sublime, by Mark Sackler

CivilizationsEnd.com

Be Prepared- a simple mans idea's

Whispering Earth

Nature patiently waits and we have only to turn back to her to find relief from our suffering - Dr Bach

Otrazhenie

Reflection

biocreativity

art. biology. creativity. science. design. nature.